Lap of Luxury

I think I’ve determined that I was designed to live in the lap of luxury. Unfortunately, my lap (yes singular-only one lap around that track for me) was a 400-meter sprint, which exhausted me and left me wondering if I got my lap at all. So here I find myself running the epic marathon, not at all prepared for my journey. 

I’m speaking metaphorically of course, for I am not actually running a marathon. But figuratively, it feels like it (although the one lap MAY have been a stretch). I have never really “had” to work. I’ve wanted to work. There’ve been times when it was best if I worked, but somehow I knew that I didn’t have to if I didn’t really want to. That has all changed. With the out-of-state house still on the market, and our renters moving out before we expected, my need for a job trumps the tantrum I want to throw about finally getting time to myself now that the kids are both in school. I don’t particularly care to see the bright side of it-that I didn’t have to work until the kids were in school when I could work without their having to be in daycare. 

I know intellectually that this time won’t last forever because none of them do. My heart seems blue at the loss of all those wonderful things I wanted to do “when the kids were both in school”. That phrase was quoted often-probably as an excuse to not do something now, but to wait. I wonder what my next phrase will be “when the kids both go to college”. I’ll have to work on that but for now, where oh where are those bon bons? Oh Lord, please help me become the woman that I was created to be by making choices today to become that woman. Amen!